Monday, 27 June 2016

Asking & Begging

Recently I've been reading "The Art of Asking" by Amanda Palmer, it turns out to be a biography, I've never read a biography before and it's different to read actually. Her main theme is about asking as the subtitle declares "How I learned to stop worrying and let people help". It got me thinking about "What's the difference between asking and begging?" - are they different or are they the same thing?

I was out walking the other day and it came to me "Asking is hoping for a yes but okay with a no. Begging is demanding a yes and refusing a no".  When you ask for help of course you want a yes but you can live/survive with a no, whereas begging you want a yes but you refuse a no and demand a yes.

Asking is a hard thing to do in our society as we don't want to be seen as not enough or weak and we don't want others to think we are begging, so we hold back, close up and remain silent. We are so frightened as being seen as weak but I believe it takes strength to ask for help because you are putting yourself out there and showing your vulnerability. "It's better to ask and be told no, then to never ask and not know".

I do struggle to ask as I have had it used against me "oh but I helped you", but I'm starting to see that shouldn't stop me because not everyone is like that and some people are just jerks. By asking for help I have gotten to be form new relationships that I never thought possible.

The more you ask the more you give others permission to ask and open up and starting showing people that asking isn't weak at all but in fact quite empowering. As a collective we can achieve greatness we just first have to ask for it.

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Sunday, 5 June 2016

Welcome Star Boy

Well it's been 6 weeks now since the miracle that is our little "Star Boy" entered into our world. What a 6 weeks it has been, our lives have been completely rearranged and I'd have to say for the better.

Star Boy, is such a good little boy. For us all this being a new thing he's doing well at coping with life. He has the most amazing smiles and then his shifty eyes as he's trying to work it all out.

We have all learned so many lessons and I know there will be many more lessons and trials to come, but we wouldn't change any of it for the world. I'm still pinching myself to see if this is really real or just some magical dream.

We've discovered a strength inside ourselves we didn't know was there and a heart of love we could never have imagined in a million years. The feeling of love is an amazing sensation, one that cannot be describe even with all the words in the world.

Every day is just going with the flow and establishing some form of a routine so as to keep a hint of reality and normalness into our lives. Sleep is gotten when possible as it's too hard to resist just starting at him all day.

I will still be keeping this space open here on 30 Days of Smiles, I'll post when I can as there are new habits to be formed now with a little one in tow, but I still want to keep my voice alive and keep a sense of me existing. I will keep writing about anything and everything as I have no boundaries or limits on my writing. I'll occasionally share snippets of Star Boys life but it will not be the main focus.

Looking forward to my new life and seeing where life takes us now, not as a couple but as a trio.

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Photo my own